Assistant Humanist Chaplain, John Figdor, reflects on the challenges the holiday season poses for secular Americans, and offers a new tradition (Festivus), from HSS (and “Seinfeld”) to you!

The winter season is a strange one for us secular folks. We never quite know how much to embrace the holiday season. As a professional atheist, I used to think I had to avoid all mention of Christmas, to try to quarantine the holiday season, if you will. But after the Festivus party with the Harvard Secular Society (HSS), I am thoroughly convinced that instead of trying to stuff Christmas, Hanukkah, and the other winter holidays back inside their wintry Pandora’s Box, it is much better (and much more fun) to reminisce about crazy family traditions and hilariously uncomfortable holiday moments.

First a little refresher on the finer points of Festivus: Festivus was essentially created by the writers of the T.V. show, Seinfeld, who tag-lined it: “Festivus, the holiday for the rest of us.” The holiday revolves around three major activities: not decorating the bare aluminium Festivus Pole, feats of strength, and the airing of grievances. At this year’s HSS Festivus party, we decided to save the feats of strength for the end and to begin with the airing of grievances as we passed out cupcakes from Sweet.

I, for one, am no stranger to amusing holiday anecdotes. As a young, supposedly Christian child, I feasted on Reindeer, much to my eight-year-old horror, a mere week before Christmas. The experience so traumatized me that I told my parents they “permanently ruined Christmas” and gave me an interesting trauma to keep future therapists entertained. However, as I found out during the HSS meeting, I wasn’t the only one with amusing holiday stories. One student bemoaned the increasingly “interfaith” characteristics of Christmas Day Chinese Restaurant Dining and Movie Theatre Attending, commenting on the new influx of Christians enjoying Chinese food on Christmas Day, by saying “shouldn’t you people be home celebrating your saviour?” As he spoke, I couldn’t help but remember that great SNL cartoon short, “Christmastime for the Jews,” which recounts the joys of Christmas from a Jewish perspective. Another student told us how her holidays were complicated by a lifelong grudge between maternal and paternal grandmothers, who required constant attention to keep them from arguing. Our own Humanist Chaplain, Greg Epstein, talked about his secular Jewish upbringing, replete with Christmas tree and one day of presents…

I left the HSS Holiday Festivus celebration in high spirits, having enjoyed the traditional Festivus activities of gathering around a pole (or in our humble case, a polar bear…), airing grievances about the holidays (which I particularly recommend to other Humanist groups around the country as a great way to vent and share stories), and watching Matt (HSS Outreach Coordinator) best Jimmy (HSS President) in a feat of strength (unless you have lots of space, this is more difficult to recommend…). But as I walked into Harvard Square to pass out the bags of leftover cupcakes, pies, cookies, and crackers from the student meeting to the homeless people who congregate near the Harvard T Station – something we do every week – I remembered what the holidays are really all about. When I gave a whole pie to a group of young folks all huddled together for warmth and saw the bright smiles light up on their faces, I didn’t even complain when they said, “Thanks! Merry Christmas!” All I said was, “Happy Festivus from the Harvard Humanists!”